One thing that I haven’t truly addressed yet in this blog is the anger that has been a part of my life for the last 3 1/2 years or so. The anger that was generated from a sloppy birth experience and follow-up care, resulting in physical and emotional damage. The “why?” and “how could this happen?” mentality that manifests itself in an anger at the doctor, the hospital, and sometimes myself.
In writing my book this past year, I had a title all picked out, “Asshole.” After the asshole that delivered me, and after the resulting damage to my asshole. Clever? I think so. Until recently, the anger I have felt at my delivering doctor has been profound. It is only through extensive therapy that I have found it in me to let it go in order to be a more productive and healthy human being.
The bottom line is, my story, my life, is not about naming names, or vengeance. It’s not about anger. This is a story of advocacy, of healing, of empowerment. I’d like every health care professional to take note of my story during his or her day-to-day dealings with patients such as myself or prevent future clientele such as myself. I’d like every pregnant woman, women considering pregnancy to take note of my story, and make better decisions because of it. I’d like every adoring spouse to take heed in the strength and sacrifice of my husband during the many ordeals we have weathered together.
Thanks for reading!
-Lauren
peaceoutofpieces 